Happy Pride, sports community!
My entire life is centred around sport and fitness. I have been participating in sport since I was five-years old, specifically basketball. After playing at the University of Regina for five years, I graduated and then obtained a Master of Coaching at the University of Alberta. I now coach full time at the University of Regina, as well as work at two different fitness facilities in the city. My time in these spaces has allowed for a lot of reflection and learning on what it means to create an inclusive and welcoming space for all – specifically members of the 2SLGBTQ+ community. Primarily, what does it look like to create a welcoming environment with active allyship, rather than an environment that simply accepts or tolerates people’s differences?
Although most of the sport environments I have been in have been positive, encouraging and safe, I realized as I got older that a positive environment was not necessarily a 2SLGBTQ+ friendly one. In some spaces I noticed a normalization of the 2SLGBTQ+ community, where other spaces didn’t speak about it at all. Before I came out, I did not realize the positive impact it had on me to be in a queer-friendly space as a closeted person. For example, places that have pronouns on their name tags or display the pride flag, outwardly demonstrate their inclusivity year-round. Upon reflection, I see that those environments made me feel the most comfortable to be myself, even though I wasn’t quite sure who that was at the time.
I noticed the biggest difference when I moved to Edmonton. There, I found myself in spaces that were loudly and outwardly supportive of the 2SLGBTQ+ community. In both sport and fitness settings, being a member of the 2SLGBTQ+ community was vocalized and normalized, which in turn made those environments feel more welcoming and eventually led to my coming out. These experiences helped me realize how much room there is for growth in actively welcoming queer people in your community, rather than silently accepting or tolerating us.
When I was an athlete, I was not at a time in my life where I felt comfortable coming out. Now, as a coach, I feel a tremendous responsibility to create an inclusive environment for athletes to discover who they are. I am incredibly grateful to work in an environment now where making change is a priority. I am hoping by reading this article, coaches and athletes alike can learn how to create safer and more welcoming spaces for each other.
What I hope people understand, is that staying silent does not demonstrate support. I have not personally experienced any outward homophobia and I have my family, friends, colleagues and people in the community to thank for that. Unfortunately, I still found myself wondering if certain environments would welcome me as a gay person. I have learned that coaches have an incredible opportunity to create welcoming spaces whether we know we have queer people on our team or not! By proactively creating an inclusive space, it demonstrates to people that they are safe and welcome in that sporting environment, no matter their sexuality.
In my experience, there are a multitude of ways to show your support for those in the community, and some are more impactful than others. For example, your language matters all the time. By not assuming heteronormativity in your conversations, it opens the door for athletes to feel safe. As a coach, I encourage you to consider the language you use with your athletes. Instead of asking your all-female team about their “boyfriends”, ask about their partners. Ensure you ask for pronouns at the beginning of the season and make a concerted effort to use the correct pronouns from then on. And don’t be afraid to admit you don’t know! Ask questions when you are curious, do research to learn and understand, and don’t assume that everyone’s experience is the same. If you know one queer person, you know one queer person. By getting to know each athlete you will learn how to best support them as an individual.
Lastly, don’t wait for members of the 2SLGBTQ+ community to do all the work. Be loud and openly accepting before you have an out person on the team so they don’t have to wonder where you stand. Show up for the community and for equity in spaces and conversations every day. And don’t forget we exist in all months of the year! Not just in June.
I am often at odds with the idea of needing to come out at all. There are times where I dream of a world where coming out does not exist – where children get to grow up and be themselves and whoever they end up loving does not require many nerve-wracking conversations. However, I think to get there, visibility and normalization are necessary now. Creating an inclusive athlete environment is not a one-time effort. It needs to be consistently shown through your words and actions. If you made it to this point in the article, you have already done a great job in moving the needle toward more inclusive spaces. Keep striving for inclusivity and let me know how I can help!
